As of today, I have 98 days left until my due date. Wow! In some ways it feels like time is dragging by, but in other ways it feels like time is flying. Yesterday I noticed some droplets of colostrum coming from my nipples. I know it sounds really weird, but I was happy about it. I thought, "My boobies are working!" I am 26 weeks today. Fertility Friend says if Cole were to be born now, he has 85% chance of survival. Those are pretty decent odds. Not that it matters. Cole needs to stay put until at least 39 weeks. I know they say 38 weeks is considered term these days, but I've also heard that boys generally need a little more time than girls to be fully developed. So, as far as I'm concerned, he needs to stay put until he is completely ready to come out.
It has been so wonderful feeling his kicks and watching my belly move around from his kicks and whatever else he's doing in there. Sometimes I'll play a little game with Cole where I'll push my belly right where he kicked and he'll kick back. We do that back and forth for a bit. It always makes me smile or laugh. It still scares me how attached I am to this little guy. I mean I knew in theory that it would be like this, but no one really knows exactly how it feels until they actually go through it. There have been a lot of women on my due date board on Baby Center who have lost their babies late in the game. It seems to me like the farther you get, the harder it is. I don't know what it's like to experience that kind of pain. I can certainly imagine it, but I hope I never have to know that kind of pain. It can be hard to strike a balance between being aware of everything that could go wrong and being able to enjoy what I have and the gift I have been given.
In school, in 3 of my 4 classes we have learned about prenatal development and reproduction. It's kind of fun to be learning about that stuff in detail while I am directly experiencing it. I've been able to share some of my own experience in class discussions which is pretty cool. I've still got to figure out what I'm going to do about spring semester. Hopefully that will all work out ok. I can't let myself worry about that too much. I just don't have the room in my brain for it.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
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